After patting themselves on the back to celebrate all the danger they heroically ran away from, our adventurers ready themselves to confront the Baron and rescue Tor's daughter. They heal up and confer with the vampire hunter they just saved for any pro tips. But the last time this guy went against the Baron he ended up as a zombie. So, he may not be the best resource. Maybe the Baron isn't all that he's been hyped up to be though. He's probably got some stereotypical bad guy voice just to seem tougher than he really is.
As the party enters the final chamber, will the Baron mind the interruption? How will he feel about these guys going through all his stuff? Will the party try diplomacy or just start throwing hammers? And will Rath be able to stop Kort from saying something they might all regret? It's time to confront a Vampire Lord!
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Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby
Logo designed by Ed Rempfer
Last episode we left our adventurers in a room with a creature that may or may not be a dwarf child. As I was sitting here thinking of how best to describe the party's imminent destruction, I did what any professional episode describer does and got distracted by the internet. There I found an article about D&D enemies that appear weak, but are really nasty. Interesting, especially given the situation our team finds themselves in! But then, I saw the image they tagged on to it. A glorious squirrel wielding an axe and a shield, riding through a battlefield on a frog. Now they had my full attention!
Scrolling through the article revealed no dwarvish girls that are clearly a death trap. In fact they even had a vampire on there which was unexpected seeing as how we know one is waiting to just obliterate our adventurers at the end of this mausoleum. Sure they may look harmless, but even our team of not-quite heroes knows vampires are bad news. "Odd", I thought, but I scrolled on as my sights were set on the majestic war squirrel. And despite all the horrors we've witnessed in this current dungeon, the true horror of this story is how I came to the bottom of the article with no mention whatsoever of this beautiful warrior. I had been struck down by the biggest fiend of them all, the clickbait!
So yes, things happen in this episode. Many of them are awful. Like Kevin's lost heroic moment. And Kyle's lost time making encounters our team skips right by. I'd love to tell you all about that, but right now I'm too busy researching Squirrelfolk for my next D&D character. Grab your acorns, and get ready for winter! Not because of anything that happens in this episode, but you know, squirrels.
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Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby
Logo designed by Ed Rempfer
As our adventurers continue their quest to save Tor's daughter from the clutches of the vampire Baron Von Uberdorf, you just have to admire the artistry with which he has created this gauntlet of creepiness. Clearly he has a passion for dungeon design! First the hedge maze to even get to his manor was just crawling with undead encounters. Then he had that giant collection of treasure guarded by a freaking mummy. And now this mausoleum, where every turn leads to another twisted terror. Each new room is basically an 80's metal band album cover. Hopefully Rath is taking notes for his dungeon business, because he's getting one heck of a free lesson here.
Wasn't the Baron trying to take over the world? Something about traveling around and starting vampire outbreaks? Sure, he's probably immortal, but who has the time for opening global vampire franchises and so much dungeon planning? It makes you question what you do with your time if he can pull all this off. He's got plots and schemes, a giant house complete with hell hounds, a healthy social life, and dudes with heads that pop off when they become awful bat creatures. And here we are just playing Dungeons & Dragons.
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Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby
Logo designed by Ed Rempfer
Looking for a fun get away with your adventuring friends? Journey through your local shuffling horde of zombies to a mausoleum today! Don't know where to find your closest oddly large underground burial chamber? Just free the spirit of a ghost held in butler servitude for directions! Once there, please don't wake the guard, he's very sleepy after a long day of doing horrible, horrible things. Just step gingerly around the piles of body parts. But watch your step! You haven't signed a waiver, and the floors are slippery. As you venture further, be sure to say "hi" to our attentive heads of staff. They just want to show you how much we love having you here.
Hey listeners, please do us a huge favor and rate Intelligence Check at www.podchaser.com/podcasts/intelligence-check-526600 ! Every rating and review is a big help in getting more exposure for the show and is greatly appreciated!
Are you enjoying the show? Please help us grow and tell someone about it!
Join the party members and other listeners on Discord discord.gg/H3fhhA7, Reddit www.reddit.com/r/IntelligenceCheck/, and Facebook www.facebook.com/intelligencecheck . Email us at intelligencecheckpodcast@gmail.com
Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !
Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby
Logo designed by Ed Rempfer
Time is running out to save Tor's daughter. Having barely pried Kort out of the siren's magical grasp, the team has approached the ghostly Butler Rempfer, desperate for any assistance they can get. It turns out he is willing to help the team locate the baron, and even point them to a powerful weapon to help defeat him. But the Butler has one condition, they return his heart to his body so that he can be free to rest in peace. He's probably sick of cleaning bathrooms. If Blag is any indication, shifters like the Houndmaster eat some gross stuff. So it's off to find a heart! Having recently visited the lab of the mad scientist Von Leachtenstein, our adventurers think they have a good idea where to start their search!
Deciding to make the most of their limited time, our adventures split up, once again violating that super basic D&D rule. Rath heads off to complete the Butler's mission, while the others go to finally raid the treasury. And that's the part where things really just all go to hell. Will the team find what they need to defeat the sinister baron? Will their lust for magical items get them in to yet another ridiculous situation? Why does Kort keep looking down his pants? And will someone please see if that crying baby is okay? They probably just want their mummy!
Have you seen our merchandise featuring designs from friend of the show kevvart? Check out all the awesome apparel, stickers and so much more at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc . And be sure to check out more of his work on instagram @kevvart!
Are you enjoying the show? Please help us grow and tell someone about it!
Join the party members and other listeners on Discord discord.gg/H3fhhA7, Reddit www.reddit.com/r/IntelligenceCheck/, and Facebook www.facebook.com/intelligencecheck . Email us at intelligencecheckpodcast@gmail.com
Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !
Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby
Logo designed by Ed Rempfer
