Intelligence Check

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Episode 55- Can’t Lose Health if You’re Dead

September 25, 2019

Last episode we left our adventurers in a room with a creature that may or may not be a dwarf child. As I was sitting here thinking of how best to describe the party's imminent destruction, I did what any professional episode describer does and got distracted by the internet. There I found an article about D&D enemies that appear weak, but are really nasty. Interesting, especially given the situation our team finds themselves in! But then, I saw the image they tagged on to it. A glorious squirrel wielding an axe and a shield, riding through a battlefield on a frog. Now they had my full attention!

Scrolling through the article revealed no dwarvish girls that are clearly a death trap. In fact they even had a vampire on there which was unexpected seeing as how we know one is waiting to just obliterate our adventurers at the end of this mausoleum. Sure they may look harmless, but even our team of not-quite heroes knows vampires are bad news. "Odd", I thought, but I scrolled on as my sights were set on the majestic war squirrel. And despite all the horrors we've witnessed in this current dungeon, the true horror of this story is how I came to the bottom of the article with no mention whatsoever of this beautiful warrior. I had been struck down by the biggest fiend of them all, the clickbait! 

So yes, things happen in this episode. Many of them are awful. Like Kevin's lost heroic moment. And Kyle's lost time making encounters our team skips right by. I'd love to tell you all about that, but right now I'm too busy researching Squirrelfolk for my next D&D character. Grab your acorns, and get ready for winter! Not because of anything that happens in this episode, but you know, squirrels.

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